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only every other memory [userpic]

"When we wake, we will find that our minds will be free..."

July 24th, 2006 (02:35 pm)

Feeling: ditzy
My Moment in Song: "If I Could"- Jack Johnson

When did we get so old?

I was at the park today and these 14 year olds (they might have even been younger!) were there, and they were all decked out in their 1/2 emo 1/2 skater wear. It was rediculous. They all had their ipods. Then some girls showed up. They were like 3/4 skater 1/4 emo, and they kept giving the guys hugs. One of the kids had a skateboard, and another one said rather loudly that he liked the song "Stairway to Heaven" and that he frequently listened to it on his ipod.


Please please please assure me that we are not walking stereoypes, and that people don't look at US the way that I looked at them. lol.

Love, Ash

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only every other memory [userpic]

"You can't change later... here and now, just how we can feel..."

June 26th, 2006 (11:07 am)

Feeling: embarrassed
My Moment in Song: "Here and Now"- Del Amitri

Does ANYONE have photoshop that can send me the program over like, AIM or Email or something? I know it's a lot to ask, but I can't find my old vs. 8 disk for the life of me, and my free trial of C2 is running out in 12 days. I just opened a graphics community, so it would be REALLY lame if I had to close it next week. PLEASE get back to me. PLEASE PLEASE. I'll owe you so huge.

Love, Ashley

only every other memory [userpic]

"It's never too late to be alone..."

June 24th, 2006 (10:13 pm)

Feeling: drained
My Moment in Song: "It's Never Too Late to be Alone"- Del Amitri

I'm addicted to www.toothpastefordinner.com

Here are some of my favorites:

MY FAVORITE ONE <3 (Can you guess why? lol):

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"To get the sensation, of you coming home..."

June 18th, 2006 (12:50 pm)

Feeling: amused
My Moment in Song: "Time and Time Again"- Counting Crows

I rarely post in here anymore, but when I saw this I thought this was SUCH a cool idea I just had to do it:

1. Think of the first word that comes to mind when you think of me.

2. Run a Google image search on that word.

3. Reply to this entry & post one of the pictures from your search, but don't tell me what the word was.

4. Put this in your journal, so I can post a picture for you!

<3 Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"The rock here has melted, only diamonds now remain..."

June 2nd, 2006 (11:30 pm)

Feeling: amused
My Moment in Song: "Clarity"- John Mayer

I know I haven't posted in a really long time. I don't know where to start, so I'll just let all these pictures speak 1000 words. This is what I've been up to lately:

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Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I want to believe her..."

March 3rd, 2006 (04:07 pm)

Feeling: home-sick
My Moment in Song: "Minnesota"- The Push Stars

These lyrics were just worth posting. This isn't a Minnesota band, but it still makes me proud to live here (in the same way Atmosphere lyrics do...)

I made Minnesota my home tonight
It's not like the picture in my mind
'Cause I was so alone it killed tonight
I'd tell any soul.. if I could find one

I feel alright it's a Minnesota night
You’ve got nothing left to show me but you’re smile
Stars so bright on this Minnesota night
Can we cut the conversation for a little while?

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"You thought you could dream, but forgot to some how..."

February 25th, 2006 (10:01 am)

Feeling: annoyed
My Moment in Song: "Lullaby"- Curious George Soundtrack

I don't write in this journal at all anymore. I am not really sure why, either. Maybe it's because Facebook has taken over my life? I don't know

For those of you who care, this semester is going a lot better than the last. My grades are fantastic, and I'm really improving as far as my attitude and commitment. I have a lot more friends, and I'm taking better care of myself, too.

I don't remember what I've written in here lately... and I don't have too much to say. It's funny, entries are easier to write when I'm happy. I don't want to give up on this journal 100%, though, because I've had it since the August before 9th grade. I mean, come on, that was almost 6 years ago!! I have to keep writing. But I find myself with nothing to say. *sigh*

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I felt like I just laid my head to rest..."

February 14th, 2006 (04:14 pm)

Feeling: cheerful
My Moment in Song: "Beverly Hills"- Weaser

Do this for me, it's pretty cool:

Johari Window

PS- Happy Valentines Day!

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"But that's what makes you beautiful..."

February 4th, 2006 (01:19 am)

Feeling: bored
My Moment in Song: "Green (Welcome to the World)"- Sister Hazel

Magazines and TV Shows always have those "Top 10 Hottest" lists... so I decided because it's 1:30 am and I'm AMAZINGLY BORED, I'd create my own. Here it is... the 10 sexiest people on earth, according to Moi:

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"Cause if you don't laugh you cry, a last cresendo when you die..."

January 18th, 2006 (03:18 pm)
Feeling: busy
My Moment in Song: "Soundtrack to Your Life"- Ashley Parker Angel

Thanks to Jackie's "nudge" I'm posting in here. I really have nothing to write. I'm packing to go to my Dad's, and then it's back to school on Sunday. Lovely.

-Project Runway 2 owns my soul.
-Winter break was amazing. Thanks to those I got to share it with.
-Ashley Parker Angel's new music is addictive.
-If this one guy turns out to be cute, I might have a boyfriend really soon.
-I'm addicted to Facebook, and that's the reason I rarely post in here.
-I'll post more when I get settled at my dads... or in RF.

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"Writing a memory, or writing a rhyme-- thinking about what's right or wrong."

January 5th, 2006 (08:02 pm)

Feeling: cynical
My Moment in Song: "Black Rock"- O.A.R.

"I walked over to the hill where we used to go and sled.

There were a lot of little kids there. I watched them


Doing jumps and having races.

And I thought that all those little kids are going to grow up someday.

And all of those little kids are going to do

And they will all kiss someone someday. But for now, sledding is enough.

I think that it would be great if sledding were always enough,

but it isn't."

-Perks of Being a Wallflower

only every other memory [userpic]

"I get all my bad habits watching you... it's true."

January 3rd, 2006 (03:31 am)

Feeling: aggravated
My Moment in Song: "Bad Habits"- Michael Tolcher

I'm over it. I'm over it. I'm over it.


It's not even the IT that I'm over the most, it's this whole post-IT stuff.

(I totally didn't even realize that said Post-It.)

It's 2006. I refuse to continue relating every song on CMT's top 20 countdown to my "life," because that isn't my life. At least it isn't anymore.

When things go wrong, move along... move along.

If I didn't stalk people on Livejournal this wouldn't be a problem. Then people (who don't deserve it?) could live their perfect lives and I wouldn't have to know about it.


This entry just broke like, 50 of my New Years resolutions- but it's 3:30 in the morning and I just DIDN'T need to read what I read a minute ago.

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"Tied up and twisted the way I like to be... crash into me."

December 27th, 2005 (06:45 pm)

Feeling: touched
My Moment in Song: "Crash Into Me"- DMB

My New Years resolution is to live in the moment. I am the crazy chick from How to Lose a Guy in 10 days, only somehow, I manage to lose them in 10 hours. I have to start focusing on the present, and not what might happen next, or what happened last time. Hopefully this will work.

I really hate fake people. Like people who act innocent when they know they aren't, or those who judge others for something they do as well. If you say that you have trust issues, and then turn around and are completely untrustworthy, then who's really to blame? UGH! But, it is funny, I haven't run across ANY of those people since I left RF for break.

Last night Erika and I went down to Uncommon and had a great little night, despite almost being raped & killed by a drunk homeless man. But oh well, that's just another night in Minneapolis for us. heh. We ran into Mike up there (hmmm.... coincidence, lol) and after I went home that night, he called me up and we went back to his place. We actually had a conversation for most of the time, too, it was very odd. He's different in a lot of ways. January will mark 3 years since we've been doing this When Harry Met Sally charade. I have no idea what's going to happen, but guess what? I don't care. This is me, living in the moment.

My Schedule for the Rest of the Week:
Tomorrow: Scrapbooking w/ my Aunt
Thursday AM: Hair appointment
Thursday Afternoon: Shopping w/ Courtney for party outfits
Thursday PM: Birthday Dinner in the City w/ my Friends
Friday: Grandma's house for Hanukkah w/ my Mom (My dad and her have seperate parties, lol)
Saturday PM: New Years Eve party @ an undisclosed location (haha Hallie)
Sunday: Lunch w/ the Girls for Mon's & My Birthday

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"Her favorite fruit is chocolate cherries---- nothing from the ground is good enough."

December 25th, 2005 (06:41 pm)

Feeling: grateful
My Moment in Song: "Chariot"- Gavin Degraw

My Presents (B-Day & Christmas/Hanukkah Combined) are as follows:

225 dollars (total) cash
Digital Camera
Fantasy by Britney Spears Perfume
50 dollar gift card to Marshal Fields
2 Sweaters
3 Really cute Tanktops
The newest Hilary Duff CD
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants DVD
A bunch of Makeup & Accessories
2 Books (He's Just Not That Into You & It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken)
100 dollars to get my hair done this week sometime
Victoria Secret "Pink" Lime Green Sweatpants
New towels (Thanks Grandma....)
A Bathrobe, socks, and Slippers
Whatever I want @ H&M (Shopping w/ my Aunt on Wednesday)

I'll update this list after my Bday parties. :)

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I lost my soul, on the road, 'bout an hour ago..."

December 24th, 2005 (09:35 am)

Feeling: content
My Moment in Song: "About an Hour Ago" (LIVE)- O.A.R.

Yesterday was my birthday, though it was VERY anti-climactic. I did, however, get 155 dollars and a digital camera. So that's good. Today my Grandpa is coming over, and tomorrow it's off to my Grandma's. I know she got me the new Britney Spears perfume, so I have that to look forward to- and I'm pretty sure that aside from money, my Grandpa got me the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants on DVD. So whoo!! lol. I'm actually excited for the next couple of days. My mom and I aren't even done with our shopping, so we're gonna do that this morning once we both get dressed. After X-mas, it's just more exciting chaos until the following weekend. Monday I'm spending with Erika in Uptown, Tuesday is a Bday party w/ Hallie and those guys (Casino, Dinner), Wednesday I'm shopping w/ my Aunt for my Bday present (H&M), Thursday is a Bday party w/Erika and that group (Chino Latino's), Friday is the Hanukkah party....... and then, who knows? I'm so glad to be home. It really IS where my heart is. <3

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I hope you make it to heaven, waiting for life here on earth..."

December 21st, 2005 (12:17 am)

Feeling: horny
My Moment in Song: "Bad Habits"- Michael Tolcher

Whenever I get bored I start looking at my archieves. Since I've had this journal since the August before 9th grade, it's always eye opening to see what I was doing/thinking back in the day. This time I focused more on this year... the days leading up to college. I was so unbelieveably optimistic. Wow. I wrote all about the guys I thought were cute, and how great this year was going to be. In September I also wrote how "November might turn out to be the best month ever," and ironically it was BY FAR the worst. Oh well. Those days are in the past.

It's 12:15 am, and I should be sleeping, but I can't. I'm not even tired in the slightest. I have a Theory final at 10:30am tomorrow... and I never studied or did the extra credit. Maybe I should wake up early tomorrow and try to do it. Hmm.. I guess that's one option.

I can't believe this Semester is almost over. Two finals left!

Now, I don't think this is exactly true:

You Are a Very Bad Girl

You are 10% Good and 90% Bad
As they say, good girls go to heaven and bad girls go everywhere!
You make most bad girls look like angels - and have a hell of a time along the way.

but I figured I'd post it anyway.


Your Reputation Is: Maneater

You're the kind of girl all the chicks hate...
And guys are both scared of you yet strangely drawn in.

It's funny... when it comes to Sex and the City... I'm am 100% Samantha on the surface... but I am 200% Charlotte in my heart. I wish I could go back to being like that again in my day to day life, but I don't see it happening any time soon. The optimism is just too much for me right now.

<3 Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"And now you're half way around the world... and I'm just a day behind

December 20th, 2005 (03:24 pm)

Feeling: cold
My Moment in Song: "Streetcorner Symphony"- Rob Thomas (fave song of all time)

Haha, alright, so I'm a HUGE dork. I was waiting in the Math office to talk to my teacher, and I picked up the book "The Missing Piece" by Shel Silverstein, and I started to cry when I read it!!!! It's the most amazing little book. I wish I would have known that before so I could have asked for it for Christmas/My bday, but I'm afraid it might already be too late.

The book tells the story of this little circle that's missing a piece out of it. And it rolls along thinking that it isn't good enough because of it's missing piece. And on his journey he finds a bunch of pieces, and tries to make them fit, but they're either too big or too small. He comes across this piece that fits him, but the little piece says "I am not a missing piece, I am my own piece," and doesn't want to connect with the circle. So, he continues his quest, singing his little song about how he wants to find his missing piece, and he finally FINALLY finds a piece that's the perfect size and fit, and wants to be one with him. So they connect together, create a whole... and roll away. But the circle then realizes that with this piece filled in, he can't roll as well anymore- and he can't sing anymore either. That he wasn't really missing a piece- that was just the way he was supposed to be. So he detaches from the piece and happily rolls away.

Okay, so I might be looking into this WAYYYYYYYY too much, but I think that is the most beautiful/romantic story ever. We all think that we're missing a piece of ourselves, and try to find it in others... we come across some people who aren't perfect fits, or they just don't want to be with us. And even when we DO find a perfect fit or match, we realize that to connect with them we can no longer be ourselves. We have to give up who we were before.

*sigh* This is what happens when no one pays attention to me!!!! hahahaha.

Bday countdown: 3 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I know... you were the last good thing about this part of town."

December 19th, 2005 (06:04 pm)

Feeling: aggravated
My Moment in Song: "Beverly Hills"- Weaser

I actually worked today- like, mad crazy. I finally felt like an actual productive student. I wrote THREE papers (!!!) and did some math worksheets today. It was crazy. I tried to study for my Geology final tomorrow, until I realized that I need to read 450 pages worth of material. I don't know WHAT I'm going to do. Maybe I should have gone to that class more often?! lol.

In other news... well, there isn't much other news. I had a nice little talk w/ Kyle Tennis this afternoon about what happened w/ me and his friend Friday night (the 'I don't like you' speech guy) and he basically assured me that the kid has been acting strange lately... so I shouldn't be too worried. lol. He also said that all night he was telling him how much he liked me!!!! WHAT THE HECK!?! Oh well. It's in the past.

Moving on.

It's 4 days until my birthday! I'm so pumped. I think I finally got all the plans worked out. I can't wait to see everyone. I miss Erika so much it's insane. Same goes for Jackie. And Nick. Oh yeah, and Hallie! Oh yeah, and everyone else, too!!! It's so hard to have pieces of your heart scattered all over the country.

Jeff (my Saturday night date) wanted to know if I'd be free to go out again before J-Term. Ehhhh.... I don't know. I'm SUCH an idiot, too, because it's like.. I'm sitting around getting annoyed with all the guys who AREN'T calling me back, and then when Jeff actually calls me back I get annoyed with THAT! Maybe there really ISN'T any pleasing me. *sigh*

Love, Ash

only every other memory [userpic]

"I'm just a notch in your bed post... but you're just a line in a song."

December 18th, 2005 (08:12 pm)

Feeling: dirty
My Moment in Song: "Thrift Store Chair"- Everclear

So, this was definetly an interesting weekend. Some people said stuff to me that totally changed the way I look at things. Friday night I ended up having dinner & drinks with this guy I kinda always thought was cute since I got to RF. That WAS fun... we have a BUNCH in common... but then it turned sour. Go figure. The next morning when I could tell he was preparing to give me the "I don't actually like you" speech I asked "Are you going to make me cry?" and he said "No... but you might make yourself cry." That totally threw me for a loop, because it's so true. People can't MAKE you feel anything- you allow yourself to react to things the way that you do.

Then last night I went out w/ that Facebook guy, Jeff. It was actually pretty fun. We went Mini Golfing, and then to Buffalo Wild Wings. It was a nice little date... but I don't know if there was any chemistry on my end. He said something that kind of sent up a red flag. The night ended with no kiss. I think he was too shy to make a move.

Am I being too picky? I know that sounds ironic, given how I've acted lately... but I'm talking about RELATIONSHIPS. Are you supposed to hold out for the perfect person, or just try to find an imperfect person that's perfect for YOU?

Tonight is totally lame. I want to hang out with ANYONE but everyone is studying. I don't have any finals tomorrow!!! I almost wish I did. I'm kind of pissed at myself, too, because out of all the stuff I've done this week, there is ONE specific night that stands out the most and I've been thinking about it all week. Everyone is convincing me that I'm crazy though. It's almost like I had to pick the guy who I know would want to be with me the LEAST, just so I could be disapointed or something.

After all of this happened, I had this conversation with my roomate:

There's this "accident forgiveness" thing offered by this car insurance commercial, and when it came on I said "I need like, 'accident forgiveness' from God," and Renee goes: "No, Ashley. You need 'accident forgiveness' from yourself."

WOW. Ugh, I love her to death.

So... this week is finals... and then I'm going HOME. It's going to be so weird. I wonder if I'll see any RF people over break. I wouldn't be too traumatized if I didn't see anyone from school... but I can think of a few people I might miss. I don't really know many people here that live in my area anyway, but we'll see.

5 day's until my Birthday!!!!!!!!!! SO EXCITING!!

xox Ash

ps- Why is the smiley face for "dirty" so unhappy looking? Maybe that's a sign.

only every other memory [userpic]

"If it feels good and sounds nice then its your choice. Dont doubt yourself, dont even think twice"

December 16th, 2005 (08:57 am)

Feeling: amused
My Moment in Song: "Sooner or Later"- Michael Tolcher

After much thought, I realize I've been over reacting. I think I have like, a dependency addiction. I can't just allow myself to get comfortabe being alone. I want to take care of someone. I suppose I could try to take care of myself...

So, on a lighter note, yesterday someone asked me if I got a boob job!!! lol. I just laughed, cuz everyone who knows me KNOW'S that if I ever did that, I'd get them like... huge. Who would buy breasts my size?! lol. But this guy was just like "I don't remember them ever being that big." I suppose he never really looked before. That just made me laugh.

Some random guy on Facebook asked me out on a date!!! I actually said yes, cuz I'm an idiot (read the first paragraph of this entry)... so now I have to go out tomorrow night on some semi-blind date. I feel bad for not being more excited, cuz this guy seems super into it... but I've been on like, guy overload this week. I don't know. I'm a mess.

I can't wait to go home to AV/Lakeville/EP. I miss my friends. I'm getting my hair done, and I'm gonna try to look like a totally different person. I know that's not possible, since I've had every color/cut of hair a person can have, but I don't want my 19th year to be as murky as 18 was. (Alright, that's not fair... 18-18.5 was the best year of my life... it was 18.5-19 that kinda sucked.)

I'm getting a digital camera for my bday this year, so I'll be posting tons of pictures in here. I'll keep ya updated on the happenings of my break. I'm sure it will just be filled with shopping w/ Jackie, and Uptown chillin w/ Erika. But that's all I'd ever want to do with my life anyway.

Okay, some totally random guy from a party I was at like, a month ago just asked me to come over and snuggle. WHAT THE HECK!? lol. I feel like I did back in highschool. Which, reminds me of this quote I must share.

Samantha: A guy could just as easily dump you if you fuck on the first date as he can if you wait until the tenth.
Miranda: When have you ever been on a tenth date?

I dedicate that to <3Erika<3, because she is the Miranda to my Samantha.

I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!! 7 DAYS!!!!!

Love Always and Forever, Ash

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